Yup, 6 weeks already gone and I haven't even introduced our lil one yet! I have decided that the names we're using are quite distinctive and I'd rather keep privacy a little better, so our son is simply going to be T :)
T was born 4:12am on Sunday April 8, 2012. The whole pregnancy was a lot harder on me than any of my previous pregnancies, but the labor went much better than expected! The two weeks before T was born were a very uncomfortable, but extremely uneventful. Trevor's Grandma had been here for the whole week and we had much enjoyed visiting with her, and had hoped T would arrive before she went home, but it was not to be! She left on Saturday morning and in spite of having a "stretch and sweep" at the doctor's on Monday and reflexology intended to ready the body for labor on Wednesday, I had NO contractions all week....T stayed put until Easter Sunday. I was very thankful that he at least came early and didn't make me wait until after his due date like Lolo did!
On Saturday morning we had slept in and I was feeling a bit resigned to the fact that this baby was NOT coming any time soon - in fact I had been chatting with my sister Amy on the phone and told her I was just trying to distract myself and/or not get my hopes up since it could still be almost 3 weeks before he came! I said goodbye to Amy and went up to get dressed (yup, completely lazy, still in my pajamas after noon!). All of a sudden, I realized there was fluid coming out of me...and I had JUST gone to the bathroom...and it WASN'T voluntary...hmmm...could it really be?! An immediate surge of adrenalin went through me as I ran back to the bathroom to see if it could really be my water....it was confirmed soon enough, since it just wouldn't stop! Then I panicked a bit..how was I going to get off the toilet without making a mess? I tried yelling for Trevor, but he couldn't hear me....so I just made a run for it and got some "protection". I ran downstairs all excited to tell Trevor what happened. Since I was GBS positive, my Dr. had instructed me to come in as soon as my water broke, so at this point I was kind of just thinking "ok, we'll get things together, get Lolo off to Aunty's and head for the hospital". I showered, ate lunch and was working on getting things packed for Lolo and the last minute things into my bag. Somewhere in there I sent a text to my Doula, we chatted a bit and decided that since I hadn't had ANY contractions since my water broke, it wasn't worth rushing to the hospital right away, she suggested a nap and maybe I should get down and scrub my floor :) I sent Lolo with Trevor the Aunty's and tried to lay down for a nap, I forced myself to stay in bed for an hour, but no luck, I was too keyed up, no sleep was coming. Trevor had a nice nap...I was jealous of him later!
So, we puttered around cleaning up the house and putting away laundry - I was thankful later that we had taken the time to do this, so we were able to come home to a cleanish and at least tidy house! All the while I was struggling to find a way to contain the "mess"....first I tried the post partum super soaker pads I had made for myself...nope- no match for amniotic fluid! Then I tried infant prefolds - they worked fine as long as I was standing up and moving around, but sitting or laying down made them useless - it finally dawned on me that Lolo still had size 6 disposable diapers for wearing at night - that was the ticket! By 5pm I was getting a bit discouraged - 4 hours had gone by and I had only had 1 contraction the whole time - not even tiny ones!
We decided to head for the town closer to the hospital and go out for dinner. We met up with my SIL there and had chinese buffet for dinner. After that we were still trying to decide what to do - I didn't want to sit in the hospital for hours on end...so we rented a couple movies and hung out at my SIL's place for a few hours - the whole time I was bouncing on an exercise ball and doing different positions intended to help the baby move into better position to stimulate labor....still no luck!
Finally, around 10:30 we headed for the hospital. My doctor happened to be there, so after I was admitted, she checked my right away, did a sweep and laid out the game plan: Baby was still high, cervix was dilated 3-4cm but still thick... She had them start me on antibiotics right away and said they would also start me on pitocin after shift change to get the contractions going. I have mixed feelings about this - I really wanted to go into labor naturally - since my previous births were both induced, however, I have a great doctor and really trust her judgement - so I didn't resist. The sweep seemed to stimulate some contractions and with the help of pitocin, my labor started not long after midnight. It was pretty intense of course...each contraction seemed to build pretty quickly on the last - I have a hard time seeing true "stages" of labor when I look back, I'm not sure when "Transition" really happened....it just built and built and built. I asked Trevor at the beginning of labor what time he thought baby would come- "8am" he replied....ACK! I thought....there's no way I want to labor like this all night! My doula later said she thought he was rather optimistic, and I silently prayed she was very wrong!
Once I was admitted and settled in, I texted my doula again and she headed our way.
She was a great help to me in getting me to move around, reminding me to change positions, encouraging me and massaging my legs and feet. All through pregnancy I had had really tight muscles all down my legs any time I had contractions, and labor was no different, so the massage really helped me to relax in spite of my body's determination to be tense. The other great thing about the doula is how well she knows the hospital and what is available, etc. She was able to go get floor matts, pillows, a birthing stool and other things that were available for me to use that I didn't know about. Since I was being induced, I had to be monitored constantly, but it was amazing what kind of positions we could accomplish within the 4ish feet of space I had to maneuver in between the bed and the machines! I stood on the mats holding on to Trevor during contractions, then kneeling and leaning over the bed, then standing and leaning over the ball on the bed. We tried to keep me upright as much as possible and moving around really seemed to help, but I was getting tired. About 3am, I needed to lay down, I just needed a break, I couldn't hold myself up any more. So I got into bed for a few contractions, first on my left side, then on my right. It really helped to just rest between the contractions as they were getting much more intense at this point. They checked me again and said I was an 8 - not too far to go. From this point onwards, things went really fast. I could feel him really moving down with each contraction. Once again I needed to change positions, I got up on my knees and leaned on the back of the bed - this was perfect, I was more upright but I could just collapse and rest between each contraction. I told them I had to push...there was no stopping it any more...they said ok, but take it easy to begin with. Well, I wasn't really in control anymore...it was amazing how my body just took over. The first contraction that I pushed I felt him move down, and they said they thought they could see him, the second contraction he got almost to the ring of fire and then the third contraction, he was crowning and part way out....the contraction was over and he wasn't out, so the doctor said, keep pushing...that was the ONLY part of labor that felt counter-intuitive or forced, but I pushed and his head finished coming out, and with one final contraction and a major push, he was out. Wow....what relief! How amazing! It was over, he was here, he was alive and I had done it! I just dropped my head down and rested for a few seconds as they tried to clean up the mess behind me. It was the perfect position for me to give birth in - it just felt so right, but it was a little strange to be staring at a wall instead of seeing what was going on!

I got turned around and settled in and held my little boy immediately - *I* got to rub him down and cuddle him and smell his newness and he never did go the the warming table. My very first glimpse of him was almost shocking - the first thing I thought was, "Wow- he looks like my mom!" I don't see it as much now, but I definitely think he looks a lot like my little brother. I held him as they finally clamped the cord after it was flaccid, and Trevor cut the cord. Only once we had had a great cuddle did they take him to be weighed and measured and so on.

Then, with his first little cloth diaper in place, he came right back and latched on for a great first nursing session. He was a champ! The textbook rooting reflex- when his face was tickled with the nipple, he would open his mouth wide and turn towards me, wiggling his head back and forth until he found what he was looking for, and then latch on.
It simply amazes me, even now, looking back, how we are created to do this amazing job of giving birth to a child. Our bodies relax, open up and work like crazy to get that baby out at just the right time. The instincts that the baby are born with are another amazing thing. Watching the miracle of it all was even more precious to me this time, as the memories of William - the tiny, sick, still baby boy that I delivered the last time I was in labor, were present, if only in a guarded place in the back of my mind. In that moment shortly after birth, looking into his eyes, I was(and still am!) incredibly thankful for the gift of life that we have been given, and for the blessing of this new tiny child that we have been entrusted to raise. I'm convinced that there is no more great and precious gift that the Lord can give us than the gift of new life in the form of a child.

Physically I did really well through the whole labor, and I was surprised to hear that I hadn't even torn and was pretty happy to make it without any pain medication. Once the room was cleaned up and T had a full tummy, I gave him to daddy and went for a shower. It was so nice to get cleaned up and back into a clean bed to snuggle with the little guy. I texted my family and friends and posted quickly on facebook before falling into a peaceful sleep. Things went so well, he nursed a couple more times on Sunday - but then scared me a bit by sleeping for almost 15 hours straight without nursing - the nurses assured me his was ok for the first 12 hours or so, but then they took his blood sugar, just to make sure. Everything was fine, and finally at 3am on Monday morning he nursed again, and hasn't looked back! The Auntie's brought Lolo to meet him after lunch on Sunday and again there were some precious "first" moments - this time between sister and brother. So neat to watch her excitement and love!

Lolo's birth seemed to be much harder on my both physically and emotionally, and I was surprised at how well I felt, even when Trevor said he was going to go home for a good night's sleep on Sunday night rather than spending another night in the recliner! I would have been in tears and so scared if he had done that the first time, but although I missed his company, I felt much more able to cope and enjoyed my solitary night of cuddling and bonding with T.

The first couple weeks were quiet and uneventful, Trevor's mom finally got to meet him when he was 5 days old, since she had been away when he was born. None of my family has been here to see him yet, but we're joyfully looking forward to seeing my oldest sister at the end of the month for a few days. I recall telling a few people in the first week or two that he wasn't much of a crier - but I take that back! He goes from 0-60 in about 15 seconds when he wakes up hungry, and it doesn't matter what you do, if he decides its time to eat, he will scream and HOWL until he gets what he wants. I'm thankful that his sleeping patterns have begun to organize quite well and he is getting into a pretty good routine of eating every 3 hours, awake time and naps for the most part. I'm not a rigid scheduler, but it definitely helpful! He's even been sleeping 6ish hours at night for most of the last week, so I'm quite happy with that!

My recovery has been much quicker and less eventful than the one after Lolo's birth, I've been quite active right from the first week, and it feels good. Its been a major relief not to be pregnant anymore, as I did not feel very well for most of my pregnancy, even though there were no major complications. Its nice to be a little more free with my diet again, as I was borderline for gestational diabetes and had to be careful with my sugars/carbs. That has helped me to change the way I think about food to some extent at least, and while I have added back some carbs, I feel like I need them less than I once did. I don't think anything has changed with my desire for sugar though....I've never been a real sweet tooth, but I DID miss it!
Its not the say there haven't been ups and downs - since there have
been, and in some ways its been a little disappointing. It seems that
since I have dealt with things better, people have stayed away more.
Chalk it up to being the second child too, but it seems since the NEED
isn't there so much, the visiting and "checking in" kind of support
hasn't been there as much, which forced me to finally voice some things
to Trevor about my need for a little more of his time...change and
growing and learning always....we never will have it ALL figured out! I
am very thankful for the people who have reached out with their time and
lent an ear, those who have brought meals and sent gifts. I appreciate
you all - this is by no means a complaint, just my honest observations
as I look back over the last 6 weeks....how it has changed my life
forever!

In other news...The spring weather has been amazing and many farmers are already done seeding here. My garden isn't in yet, but well on its way - mostly laid out, the tilling mostly done and all the seeds are ready to go - just have to wait for this weekend's 1/2" of rain to dry up a bit more! I had a great trip to Winkler to kick off my mother's day weekend last friday - Lolo stayed with Aunty while T and I went with my friend Jeanette and her youngest daughter to the big book sale in town and a bunch of garage sales. It was a great time!! This week my 50 chicks are coming and next week Becky comes. The plan was/is to paint my kitchen while she is here, so I've been busy prepping- stripping wallpaper, cleaning, tidying, picking colors, etc. etc. I'll share some pics when its all done! Anyways, the time has ticked away too fast, as it always does when I sit down to write (the main reason why I don't do it very often lately). There are so many things flitting through my mind that I'd like to share, but its much past bedtime (I should be a pumpkin by now!) - so I'm going to add some pictures and call it good for tonight.