Where to start

Well, Amy commented that it had been a long time since I blogged - and it has... There has been too much on my mind to know where to start. I haven't been enjoying my job all that much lately, and have been debating what to do about it - on top of which they decided to make some changes that make me less happy then I already was and told other people about it, but not me... I've really been trying to sort out how I feel about it but the more I think, the more confused I become because I'm not sure how I should react to these things. On one hand I've been taught to stand up for myself and not let other people take advantage of me - Dad says "You're not just an employee, you're a contractor, you provide them with your services and they are to work fairly with you about compensation and conditions" So - as asked by my boss I wrote down the issues that I've been having and my feelings about the upcoming changes and sat down and had a meeting with her. In some ways it felt like a very profitable meeting - as she was able to hear me out on some issues that I've never had the nerve to bring up before and she agreed with me about some of the major downfalls. In response to this - she asked me to take a position that would provide the leadership needed to make some changes but also put me in a position of much increased stress- which I DON"T want...the conditions were also such as to take away one thing I wanted and provide me with small compensation for it... So after some turmoil and discussion with Trevor and such, I decided to say no to her offer. Now I'm not sure where I stand, and I'm maybe more confused then I already was. I had looked around at other jobs available, but sometimes I think it would be just as easy to just stay put and put up with the crap. I'm always afraid that if I give up what I have, I may not like the next thing as much. Then there is the ongoing inner battle...half of me wants to go have some sort of adventure again...but half of me (or perhaps more then half as of today) wants to settle down, build a home, get some animals and start a family. This inner battle has something to do with the job thing too - because if I am going to have a child in the near future, then I don't want to go and start a new job - and if I'm going to have adventure first, then I definitely want a different job.... *sigh*

Enough of that - so what have I been up to? I got on a sewing kick the last couple weeks - I made a baby quilt for my friend Grace and some cute and crazy baby things for Katie's baby. I tried out several new patterns and found some to be really great, and some not as exciting. I also visited our local quilting store for the first time - a very dangerous thing. As of right now I have everything I need to start the baby quilt that will be made to fit the cradle I made for Amy - I'm not sure If I'm going to post pictures of the progress or make it a surprise....I just can't make up my mind - come to think of it - that's my major problem lately - I just CAN"T make decisions.... *sigh* Well, there's lots more to say and pictures of projects, etc but I'm at work and don't have any pictures and I need to go get my mail before lunch is over - so I'll post this and promise an update - before too long this time!